One of them at least. The right side of my jaw hurts every time I move it.
You don’t deserve what I’ve done to you. You are the only person who gives a damn and is willing to deal with all of my stupid fucking bullshit. I’m not anywhere near a man, I am still the same emotional, scared boy… I’m sorry it is apparently impossible for me to grow up and face these demons, and instead act jaded, self-deprecating, and hateful. And when you sat and listened and told me I would be alright and things would get better, I took it out on you instead of appreciating and thanking you for the unconditional love you gave me. I hope you find it in your broken heart to forgive me. I am sorry for everything that I have done and for the way I have been acting. This is not what you deserve.
I’m just a fuck up. I don’t know where my mind is and I pretty much hate myself. ha
I cannot do this. I am so terrified right now.
I feel like I’m going absolutely nowhere. I don’t feel capable of doing anything worthy of anyone’s attention.
All my friends are going to school and I’m starting to wonder if I’m making the right decision. I feel like I’m on a path that I don’t have the strength to walk on.
I kill myself over all these thoughts and I still feel like a useless fucking waste of space.
I’m going to go insane.
And it’s getting so hard to even save myself anymore.