I think my wisdom teeth are starting to come through
One of them at least. The right side of my jaw hurts every time I move it.
August 2011
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I am trying my best to not end it all.
You don’t deserve what I’ve done to you. You are the only person who gives a damn and is willing to deal with all of my stupid fucking bullshit. I’m not anywhere near a man, I am still the same emotional, scared boy… I’m sorry it is apparently impossible for me to grow up and face these demons, and instead act jaded, self-deprecating, and hateful. And when you sat and listened and told me I would be alright and things would get better, I took it out on you instead of appreciating and thanking you for the unconditional love you gave me. I hope you find it in your broken heart to forgive me. I am sorry for everything that I have done and for the way I have been acting. This is not what you deserve.
I used to worry about not going to school while all my friends did. Sometimes I still do. BUT what if I'm not supposed to go to school? Sure it'd help a lot in the future. But maybe I'm not meant to go to school. I'm slowly starting to enjoy the way my life is. It isn't perfect and sometimes it's hard but I've recently come to the realization that you need to just enjoy what you've got and roll with the punches. I'm not sure what you're going through but one day you'll get to the same place.TBC
I’m just a fuck up. I don’t know where my mind is and I pretty much hate myself. ha
This scares me to no end
I cannot do this. I am so terrified right now.
I can't even write a song.
I feel like I’m going absolutely nowhere. I don’t feel capable of doing anything worthy of anyone’s attention.
All my friends are going to school and I’m starting to wonder if I’m making the right decision. I feel like I’m on a path that I don’t have the strength to walk on.
I kill myself over all these thoughts and I still feel like a useless fucking waste of space.
I’m going to go insane.
And it’s getting so hard to even save myself anymore.
